Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

As you read my blog, you are contributing to the success of Peace Corps. Have I taken the time to explain this? I don’t know. Therefore, let’s quickly go over the Peace Corps’ Goals.

1. To help the people of interested countries in meeting their needs through technical assistance
2. To help promote a better understanding of Americans on the part of the peoples served
3. To help promote a better understanding of other peoples on the part of Americans

Put simply, Peace Corps sends volunteers to work in countries and communities where help has been requested. We do not march into a country, puff up our chest, and say, “I am here to save the people!” Peace Corps served in Bolivia from 1962 through 1971. Then we were asked to leave. We were invited to return by the Bolivian government in 1990. We will see if we are asked to leave by President Evo anytime in the near future. So we’re only here if they want us to be. That’s goal one.

Goals two and three…basically we are talking about cultural interchange. We are here to integrate with the people so that they understand what Americans are about, and so we as Americans understand what other people are about. It’s so that when people think of the U.S., they do not only think of Bush. And when Americans think of Bolivia, they do not only think of Evo (if they’ve ever even heard of him at all.) It’s through cultural understanding that real peace can be achieved in the world. We are all humans, regardless of race, religion, etc etc. We’re all fighting to live a happy, comfortable life. At times the endless poverty, pain, and suffering in the world seems too much to take on, but someone’s gotta take a go at it. Someone’s gotta try. I guess that someone might as well be me.

Let me jump off my beauty queen soapbox for a minute and stop talking about world peace. Let’s talk a minute about these Peace Corps goals. People sometimes think that development work leads nowhere. What happens when a volunteer spends two years building latrines only to find that when he leaves, the people use the latrine as storage space and continue using their backyards, sidewalks, and rivers as a toilet? Was this project a failure? Was this a waste of two years worth of time?

Enter goals two and three: a better understanding of other cultures. This may sound like government-speak for “if our projects fail, at least we can say the volunteer did something with his time there.” This may or may not be true. It may be a way to save face. But if you are living these words, day-in and day-out, there is no doubt that these goals are just as important as any technical assistance a volunteer could offer. In a letter a friend wrote to me before I left for Bolivia, he reminded me of something I once said on my first trip to Honduras- “Experiences are defined by the people you’re with and the relationships you make.”

How true is that? Moving to a new country, leaving all your friends, all your family, all that was normal and familiar makes you realize that life really is about who you spend it with. What good is living in the most beautiful place on earth if you have no one to share it with? Why go on a six-hour hike to see the sunset when you look next to you and realize that no one is there?

Then again, how cool is it when you can make brownies with a neighbor and realize that you really can get along in a second language. Or when you leave the town for two weeks and come back to see the 80-year-old grandpa in the plaza come towards you with a great big bear hug and endless kisses on the cheek asking, “Where have you been? Why didn’t you get my permission to leave? I’ve been looking for you for weeks!”

I have never lived in such a small town. Peace Corps volunteers are always told that they live in a fishbowl. People are watching our every step. At times I feel like I am suffocating. I have been the victim of gossip; I have made friends who later turn out to be complete frauds. Other times I walk down the street and am happy with the fact that everybody knows me.

I’m not used to conversations in the street. I’m used to a goal-oriented life. If I’m going to the market, I have only enough time for a quick “Hola, buen dia!” to anyone I pass. And then I realize that once I get back from the market, I have absolutely nothing to do. Why not take the time to have a real conversation with a real person? Why not take the time to stop and smell the roses? Here life does not revolve around work. It revolves around people. It revolves around relationships.

“Anda con calma” is one of the Bolivians’ favorite sayings. Loosely translated, it means “Take it slow”. As I’m trying to make friends, trying to build relationships, trying to fulfill goals two and three of Peace Corps, I have to remember that it’s a constant jig. I’m making progress but progress here looks like two steps forward, one step back. Two steps forward, one step back. And as always, “Anda con calma.” I’m slowly learning.